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3 Steps to Developing a Robust Mind Set/ Part 1

1. Before setting up on a new endeavor, you need to give your expectations a reality check.

With any endeavor that you decide to undertake you must have a robust mind set, in order to be able to stick to your plan and be able to push through when the tough gets going.  However, to prepare for success you have to start with a reality check.

Yes it is OK to think big but at the same time do not lose sense of perspective.

If you have been smoking for 15 years it might be asking too much to stop smoking overnight.  Your chances of success would be greatly increased if you picked a date in the future, and would plan how many cigarettes you would need to cut down gradually until day 0 arrived.

However, be prepared for the days that your target will not be met and indeed the days that you will smoke far more than you would have expected.  Likewise, when you arrive at day 0 and stop smoking, do not become disillusioned if you pick up another cigarette again.

Likewise with any course of action that you lay down in search of your desired outcomes, do bear in mind that after all we are all humans, we are not infallible superheroes. When aiming for transformation in your life, you will stand a better chance if, when approaching your goals, you are realistic with yourself.

It is OK to have big goals but be realistic with your efforts in reaching the different sub-goals towards your final aim. Do not go out with all guns blazing only to be disappointed if you do not reach the sub-goals.

Failure is an intrinsic part on your journey to success.

Yes, at times we will fail but do not use this as an excuse to trample all the hard work that came before it, even if it happened on day 2 of your program. Missing your target, or having a momentary lapse is normal, not a reason to relapse and follow your old ways. Stay committed. In simple terms, the overall target has not yet been achieved.

You simply just faced a blizzard.  It is time to regroup and no matter how far you slipped down the mountain, it is time to get up and make steady progress towards your peak.

The secret here is to assign such days to the bad “psychological weather conditions” and keep forging ahead.

Do not make the mistake of thinking you have to start from day zero, when you have a lapse.

A great tool to assist you is http://dontbreakthechain.com/ which effectively is a calendar where you can tick everyday that you have worked on achieving your goal.

The aim?

It is to have an unbroken chain, for as long it takes, in order for you to accomplish your goal. Some will be for a life time, as is the case if you wanted to give up smoking.   Others will be periodical.

For example, as you work on launching a new website or even your very own first blog.  The purpose of having an unbroken chain of days leading up to your goal is to visually show you how many days you have actually worked on your goal and quantify your effort.

Thus, if you have a lapse, do not discount any of the days that you have previously succeeded in making your goal come true.  Instead, simply do not mark the lapsed day and continue as soon as possible, preferably, the day after your lapse.

So if you had gone 5 days without smoking, and you lapsed on day 6, simply pick yourself up on day 7. This day should not be considered day zero where you will start all over again, but day 6 on your journey towards being cigarette free.

It is important to have sub-goals that are in line with your character that will allow you to work on reaching these as often as you can until you reach your final goal.  So for your main goal it is OK to aim as big as possible, even if at first it seems out of your comfort zone, but then break it into smaller sub-goals that you will be comfortable with.

So imagine that you would like to be financially free in the shortest time frame possible. You would need to first calculate what would the monthly figure that could allow you to pay all your bills and have enough to invest and spare to save.  Let’s say this figure would be £20,000 per month.

Would it be realistic to expect to reach this figure within a month?

Perhaps not.

However, if you are confident you could, please do get in touch, and let me in on your secret.

But in general assuming such a tight time frame is rather unrealistic. However, if you were to add, on average, an extra £18 per day or £550 per month over a period of 3 years, this would be more realistic and provide you with a realistic chance of success.

Do not make the error that some people do, which is to be absolute about their choices when trying to implement change: the all or nothing attitude.  Thus if they slip they chuck all the previous efforts to the bin of history feeling deflated and becoming self-critical, beating themselves for “failing” and, God forbid, many times giving up along the way. When if they persisted just a little bit, kept on pushing, they would have achieved their goal. Failure is an intrinsic part on your journey to success.

Failure?  What is failure anyway? If not a reminder that you are about to progress to the next level. It is a plateau during the learning experience, that needs to be overcome to take you to next level of your learning process.

Imagine if humans, whilst going through any learning experience from learning to walk to learning to drive, learning to  public speak, just gave up at every turn they “failed”.

Failure?  What is failure anyway? If not a reminder that you are about to progress to the next level. It is a plateau during the learning experience, that needs to be overcome to take you to next level of your learning process.

Failure is the point of which you are facing resistance and what actually seems like failure is but an indication that you are ready for a breakthrough and that once you break through it, signals that you have evolved along the process of learning and most likely will not face the same “failure” again.

Imagine you are learning to dance salsa, and there is a particular move that you just do not get it.  However, after being persistent and not being daunted by the prospect of keeping on trying, you suddenly get it.

Suddenly what seemed quite awkward falls into place.

Moreover, it is very unlikely that you will feel awkward again when trying the same step again, because as a salsero -Salsa dancer- have evolved along your learning experience.

Likewise, if in business you fail at a particular task, in fact your simple take away lesson is that what you have just tried would not work if you were to do it all over again and that this can be discounted along your journey to success. Therefore you must seek an alternative.

It might even be that you would have to fail several times before you actually triumph.  The crucial thing to remember is to carry on and not simply become discouraged and give up when you face an obstacle.

Thus, for example when launching a new product or service, you find out that the way you decided to approach the marketing did not work for you because the money spent on your advertising channels did not produce the return on investment you expected.

Failure and failures are but steps of the learning process that need to be trodden upon, taking you to new heights of awareness and knowledge.

This is by no means reason to despair.  Consider it market research. An opportunity to fine tune your marketing strategy.

Next time, you could  perhaps consider alternative channels that would be less costly or even be free in order to diffuse your marketing message.

This time you might have guerilla videos on http://www.youtube.com/ or on other video syndicating sites that would broadcast your message.

You might even write PR articles on even informative articles on your industry and post them on article directory sites such as Ezine (Electronic articles) Directories like http://ezinearticles.com/ and in the author’s bio include information about your product or service, linking back to your site/ blog.  And so forth, until you came up with the ideal mix to share your marketing message. Learning from your failures along the way.

If you are into Guerilla marketing you should check Jay Conrad Levinson, the master himself by visiting his site .

Failure and failures are but steps of the learning process that need to be trodden upon taking you to new heights of awareness and knowledge.

The difference between successful people and those that are not, is that the successful individual learns from their failures, dust themselves up and forge ahead whilst those that are not successful let failure defeat them and stay “down”.

Thus in order to develop a robust mindset that will allow you to persist until your goal is achieved, you first must be prepared to fail, welcome it and accept it as a barometer of your progress, learn what you can from it and use it as a stepping stone to take you to the next level, close to your aim.

Remember: as Theodore Bryant states in his highly recommended book: Self-Discipline in 10 Days: How to Go from Thinking to Doing (Paperback) (amazon aff link) “Failure is a stepping stone not a tombstone.”

In my next post I will be writing how you can switch from “I cannot” mentality to “I can” in order to excel in life.

Stay tuned.

Please do leave a comment if this post resonates with you in any way.  And if it stirs you positively and you feel someone else can benefit from it, feel free to share this post.

Wishing you great success.

{ 1 comment… add one }

  • bedanson March 24, 2017, 7:50 am

    Superb advice.

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